Zoro's and Luffy's Instincts
by YohoAruto
Summary: Any One Piece fan would know that if you followed Zoro: you'll get lost. If you followed Luffy: certain doom might come your way. Both will lead to an epic adventures. Both will lead to horrific disasters. But which one is better to follow?


Me: Yosha! Man, I have to write this two times since it didn't save the last time! It sucks XD But oh well, gives me a good chance to revise some of the stuff that I haven't approved on

Zoro: Che. That's pretty careless of you to do that.

Me: *threw a fish on Zoro's face* Let's continue on ^^

* * *

><p>Luffy's Instincts vs. Zoro's Instincts<p>

"No, it's this way Zoro!"

"Aho! It's this way!"

Both the captain and the first mate glare at each other pointedly; seemingly ready to rip each other's throat out.

"We always get lost when we follow you Zoro!"

"We always get in trouble when we follow you aho!"

Neither one of them are planning to give in to the other: as said of the mencing aura around the two that could basically terrorize any kind of Sea King away for miles, maybe even Garp if he didn't notices that it came from his grandson in the first place.

Well, to basically put the situation in a few words: They're lost.

Currently, the two overly-powerful pirates (to the normal people at least) are fighting over on which way they should go that would cause the least of casualties; both of them pointing on a different path of a fork road. Luffy's left. And Zoro's right. Or up and down as they would call it either way and some other vocabulary that only some certain idiots with no (almost non-existence) sense of direction could call it.

Anyway, in any other case at this moment, it doesn't seem that nothing would change their minds of what they had already planned. Nothing seemed to faze both's determination. Not even booze or meat... wait a minute, let's rethink about that.

"But Nami will kill us if we don't make it back!"

"Not if whatever unfortunate event tries to kill us first!"

Both had very good points. To upstage the mikan-loving woman would certainly mean death for anyone. But with Luffy's unusual attraction to trouble; it isn't so much better as it is.

"We can beat up whatever comes along the way! Nami's scary though!"

"Aho! What if it's something that we can't beat up?"

"Like what? We can beat up anything!"

"What about lava?"

"We have to beat up Lava? Who's Lava?"

"Baka!"

While Zoro does have a great point; who does want to meet Nami when she's that scary?

"Look Luffy..." Zoro between clentched teeth. "My way is better. Less dangerous. And maybe we can get to the ship in one piece!"

"Demo Zoro!" Luffy encountered, puffing his cheeks. "Nami will be there when we get to the ship! It wouldn't matter if we got there in one piece!"

They are really in trouble. Neither one would give in, the sun already setting.

Both of them could separate and go to the way they wanted, but Nami forced them together so that they would actually look out for each other. Not one of the wisest idea... but she was too mad at the fact that Luffy ate all of their provisions... again... to even think about the, most-likely hazardous, pairing.

She threatens them that if one comes back without the other, she wouldn't hesitate to abuse their manhood.

Sheesh, Nami is scary. What did they ever do to her?

Then, just all the sudden, both Zoro and Luffy had similar ideas.

End of the world?

Surely not.

They both looked over the way between the two paths of the forked road, only seeing the undeveloped and dangerous-looking jungle that separates the two path. In their eyes, that definitely looked much more safer.

I mean, they just need to go to the otherside of the island, right? So it wouldn't matter whether which path they go as long as they get to the otherside of the island where their ship is, right? But since they don't completely trust the paths, they decided that going through an unexplored jungle that _**could be**_ infested with dangerous animals would be a much better idea!

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><p>From the opposite direction from where the two are going:<p>

"WHERE ARE THOSE TWO AHOS?"

The two youngest of the straw hats (Chopper and Usopp) along with their friendly skeleton, Brook, both huddled up and quivered before the mighty woman who is emitting a fiery aura that is slowly growing out of her whole being.

The "ero-cook", as Zoro would describe him, was too busy basking in the glory named "Nami-swan", saying how her temper complimented her lovely features.

Franky decided to stay out of the whole ordeal and looked out to see if Zoro or Luffy is coming back anytime soon, for he rather that she would take her anger out on those two than of his Thousand Sunny that he made quite proudly.

Robin is absolutely, completely calm of this situation, only chuckling at the navigator's rage. This isn't exactly the first time that her captain and the swordsman would be late.

"Now now, I'm sure they'll be back very soon~" reassured the ever-so cool Robin.

"BUT IT IS WAY PASS THE TIME I HAD LAID OUT FOR US TO GET BACK TO THE SHIP BEFORE THE WIND CHANGES!"

All of the sudden, the earth began to quake, making many of the straw hats panic.

"N-Nani?" Nami loudly questioned as held onto the railings, wondering what in the world would trigger a sudden earthquake.

"SHISHISHISHISHISHISHISHISHI! RUUUNNNN ZZZOOOOOOORRRROOOOO!"

Nami twitched as she heard a loud voice, the earthquake steadily coming to an end. She could recongized that voice even a thousand miles away!

With a very dark gaze as sharp as medusa's (thank god for not giving Nami the ability to turn anyone into stone), Nami slowly turned her head towards where the voice had originally came from.

The easily frighten ones shivered as they can feel that her aura of anger, had just evolve into something much more evil and darker. They do wondered if Luffy and Zoro would get out alive this time. Then again, they do wondered that every day.

Nami felt a twitch under her eye as she saw something unbelieveable, yet at the same time, not so unbelieveable.

Luffy looked up ahead to see the ship and his crew looking at him in shock. To think that they should be use to this everyday. And he obviously didn't notice the murderous aura around his navigator. That or he probably didn't think much of it.

"NAAAMIIIIII! TTHEERE YYOUU GUUYS ARRE!"

"ARE YOU AN AHO?"

There they are, those two idiots; running away from hot molten lava that is bursting through the jungle as fast as it is destorying everything in its path. There they are, those two bakas; jumping from treetop to treetop to get away further from the lava.

There they are, those two crazy-ass' crew; jaws extending to the ground (except for some chosen people).

Many harsh worded insults came running through their minds. Sadly, all insults are accurately correct.

This is their captain they're speaking of. Along with they're first-mate.

"HAHA! SO YOU MEAN THIS LAVA, HUH? GUESS I CAN'T PUNCH IT, HUH?"

"NO SHIT!"

Ignoring his swordsman's words of complaints, Luffy then turned towards where the ship is.

"NAAAMMMIIIIIIIII! SET SAIL!" Luffy instructed, flashing a grin as if everything would be fine.

Of course, some others couldn't help but think the opposite. They couldn't be positive all the time unlike their no-brainer captain.

Nami facepalmed but complied to what her captain said.

"YOU HEARD HIM. SET SAIL!"

"B-But wait, what about-"

"LEAVE THEM THERE TO DIE FOR ALL I CARE!" Nami yelled as she stomped over to the steering wheel, yelling orders for the others so to set sail without any qualms.

Chopper, who asked the question, couldn't help but shiver at the navigator's rage.

Robin smiled reassuringly at the doctor. "Don't worry, it's navigator-san's way of caring."

Chopper couldn't help but doubt that nonetheless. Robin is usually right; but he's too scared of Nami to even think to that direction.

As the ship was about to be pulled out of the bay, Luffy was then at the distance where he can fling his arm all the way to the ship's mast, his other arm holding onto his swordsman.

That excited grin on Luffy's face doesn't look really reassuring on Zoro's part. Heck, since when does that kind of grin on Luffy means anything good?

"GOMU GOMU NOOOO-"

"WAIT A MINUTE LUFFY!"

"ROCKET!"

A loud sound of skull against wood echoed for miles.

Zoro was immediantly quivering and cursing on the deck near the mast because of the huge bump on his head, while Luffy just laughed at how fun it was flying from there to over here, not taking notice of his first mate's pain.

To describe the situation short: they slung over to Thousand Sunny and ended up throwing themselves head first onto the mast.

It hurt -as Zoro would describe- like hell. Luffy is just plain lucky that he's made out of rubber, his bump that was on his head already deflated down in seconds.

Well, not for long as Nami soon after assulted the boys out of sheer frustration.

Now, Luffy has several steaming bumps on his head, knocked out on the floor with his first mate. He certainly wasn't quivering; but the pain was unfortunately felt.

And Zoro's pain was simply added from hell to fatal.

"YOU IDIOTS!" Nami yelled as she pointed towards the abused boys.

And then the navigator pointed towards the very same island where lava is sprouting out in the middle.

"HOW DID THAT HAPPENED?"

Luffy -being Luffy- gladly answered the questioned since he saw no harm in it.

"Well, you see, we were on our way back to Thousand Sunny -honest!- and the mountain-"

"THAT'S NOT A MOUNTAIN! ROBIN JUST SPECFICALLY EXPLAIN THAT IT'S AN ACTIVE VOLCANO!"

"-was in our way-"

"AND DIDN'T I INSTRUCTED TO NOT GO NEAR THE VOLCANO?"

"-so Zoro tried to slice a hole through it!"

There was a moment of silence. One word went through everyone's head: Idiot. Who would slice a hole through a volcano?

"But it took too long so I tried to Bazooka through instead!"

No words can describe the boundless stupidity that their captain has. There is not a word in the universe that can describe it.

Nami left the two idiotic idiots of the kingdom of idiots that might as well be renowned as the rulers of idiots, shouting out orders so they could meet their destination; though not without thoroughly beating them up till every space of skin on their body turns black and blue. And if that wasn't enough; Nami decided to hang them over the side of the ship, hoping that some kind of sea-creature would eat them.

No one had the guts to have pity on them.

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><p><em>And so, the mortal of the story if you have to pick between to follow Luffy or to follow Zoro; pick either one of them but never on a direction they both agreed. If they agreed on a direction; that would be almost be a sign of an apocalypse. You'll get lost <strong>and<strong> get into a situation where there is zero to no chance of surviving._

Me: lol, I have meant to post this soon. But the time has gotten away from me because of school and other stuff and this and that. I just love this story so much; it's hilarious, fun-filled (though I'm sorry for abusing you Zoro, Luffy).

Luffy: It's fine! ~

Zoro: It's not!

Me: well, I haven't been writing updates a lot on my other stories; didn't have time. This will hopefully make up for it. I will try to make updates later on, ciao! ~


End file.
